Wow! has it really been 4 days since my last post? I am embarassed and sad. I missed blogging and the rest it affords me. Weird, but it really puts me in a restful and contented state of mind. It keeps me focused and forces me to be on my knees and in my garden for a word from Him....for me and for you. I have had some time with Jesus, but I must confess, not as much as I need.
This morning, I had a great time with Jesus. I dont know why I was thinking about this, but I was praying and thinking about Moses. I was wondering and asking God about his relationship with him and the severity of his punishment when he struck the rock and was not allowed to enter the promised land. I thought about how disappointed he must have been. I was thinking about it, and realized several things:

I don't think he was really disappointed. Actually, he was probably relieved. Remember he had just spent 40 years wandering around with those whiny, ungrateful, untrusting people. I think I would have been happy to be in heaven and rid of them! He probably didnt feel that way, in fact I wouldn't either. I am sure there were some people he would really miss. I know that even when my kids are whiny and ungrateful, I still miss them. I just hope they will grow up someday and not whine and complain.

Also, even though he may have been disappointed, the thought of heaven when you are old and tired is pleasant and welcoming. He was thinking about Gods welcoming arms, not about what he was going to be missing here. I don't think of it being so much of a punishment as a reward for a job mostly well done.

So I asked God about my life and my disobedience. God and I had a conversation, and it occured to me: I wonder how many blessings and opportunities I had missed because of my disobedience? God used Moses to show us that our disobedience costs us, and it can cost us dearly. But if we trust God, and follow him, even when we do disobey, God still blesses us, just like he did Moses.

God planned for Moses to go with the Children of Israel into the promise land. But he also knew he wouldn't make it. But still he used Moses to deliver the Israelites and show everyone the great "I AM". He knew the Israelites would have to wander for 40 years to get "Egypt out of them". And he knew that Moses would strike the rock and not make the cut of those who go in. Maybe he did other disobedient stuff. But that is not what the Bible indicates. But what I do know is that God used him anyway. And he took a terrible situation and made it even better because he loved Moses and wanted to show him.

So he took Moses home. Really home. To the real land flowing with Milk and Honey. He took Moses disobedience and forgave him, and blessed him in spite of it. He gave him more than he could ever ask or imagine. I am not saying to just go ahead and be disobedient. Quite the contrary. I still wonder who I didn't touch or what I missed because of my disobedience. But I know that he makes all things beautiful in his time. So I trust him and know that I am so blessed and I don't want to miss out on any more by being disobedient.

Colossians 3:5-14 says:
Put to death, therefore whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. Because of these, the wrath of God is coming. You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language form your lips. Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and in all. Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against on another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which bonds them all together in perfect unity.

That says it all. And what better reason is there than that? We are no longer under law, but under love. And I love Jesus so much that I want him in all of me, over all of me and oozing out of all of me. Not because I might loose my spot in heaven. I know I can't do that. But I don't want to disappoint him. So I want to please him and show him my love by obeying him in love. I will fail. But knowing he loves me and forgives me gives me hope and makes me want to do better and better in his strength. And that is my goal.

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