Wow! I just looked at the date of my last post, and I cannot believe it has been since last January! The year has just flown!
Well, here we are again at Christmastime, and I was just bemoaning the fact that I was not acheiving my goals, and just generally frustrated with my walk with Christ, because I had once again lost sight of him in this busy time of year. Thankfully, though, I had been voicing my frustration with myself to the Holy Spirit, and faithful as always, he began to reveal why. So here I am, ajusting my spiritual attitudes AGAIN. How easy it is for me to loose my vision. I wonder if God ever gets as frustrated with me as I do with myself and consequently with others?
There is so much going on in my head right now, I hardly know where to begin.
I guess I will start where I am, which is usually better than trying to go backward, because that involves stories that would just take me off point, and go where I am going, but in a round about way that is neither pretty or comfortable. For me, anyway. You might enjoy reading it, but I wouldn't enjoy revealing the darkness that is still in my heart after 43 years of following Christ.
At any rate, suffice it to say that I was struggling with the people around me just not "getting it". Now if you wonder what I mean by that statement, you may not struggle like me. In fact, you may not "get it". Not to insult your intelligence or your spirit, and truth be told, I think it is more my problem than anything. I am prideful and arrogant, and really, just plain sinful. And I am the one who really doesn't "get it" most of the time. That is what the Holy Spirit was trying to tell me.
You see, I have been frustrated with my family during this season. It started even before we began to put up the decorations. Every year it is the same thing: We start something as simple as putting up the tree (did I just say it was simple to put up a tree???) and it always ends with someone mad at someone else and feelings hurt and mom crying. After all, I just want to do a family thing for a couple of hours without all the fussing and selfishness. But it happened again this year and I cried, AGAIN. I used to love Christmas. But after 38 years of living with Scrooge and his minions, and the selfish little beasts who God has chosen to use to reveal my desperate need for him (because of my own selfishness) through (ie: children...5 of them! I must really be worse off than I had orginally thought), I no longer look forward to putting up the decorations. It is now a chore that I do, not that I enjoy. But I digress.
Anyway, they roll their eyes when I say, "hey! lets read Christmas devotions!" or "lets watch a Christmas movie" or, "you want to bake cookies with me?" well, not so much the cookies, cause they know they will get to eat some. But you get the picture. Anything that involves "Christmassy stuff", they act like they are going to the dentist.
I was just feeling so justly self-righteous, and wondering why they didn't "get it."
I mean, its our Saviours Birth for heaven's sake!!! Why wouldn't you want to savor every moment??? Why wouldn't you want to devote yourself fully to this time of year when heaven and nature sings of the glory of God in the Highest? Why I as you? Why?
So I got all up on my high horse, thinking: "I am the only one who gets it. Why don't they care? Why don't they love you like I do?" And all the while praying that they would "see what I see" and that they would love him like I do, while getting angrier and angrier, and wondering why my prayers seem to fall on deaf ears.
DUH!! So I asked God: "Why won't you just show up and fix them? They are driving me crazy!!! Especially my husband!! So I turn on the radio in the car (which I NEVER do) and here was this guy from Walk in the Word ministries talking TO ME! sounded like the voice of God, really.
He said, "what is the difficult circumstance that God is using to bring you to a place of humility before him? God orders the circumstance of your life to put you in a position to see how desperately you need him." Could it really be that simple? So I went to their website, and here is what I found:
The Benefits of Waiting
"I waited patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me and heard my cry. He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the Lord." - Psalms 40:1–3
The longer I live, the more I come to understand that life doesn't have a lot of green lights. There are hardly any times where God is like, "Do you want that? Have it right now. Why didn't you ask sooner?" More often God is like, "I'd like you to wait."
"No! I want it right now!"
God is like, "Listen! You might think you want it now, but I'm going to give it to you when you're fit to receive it. I'm going to use the process of waiting to shape you into the woman or the man that I want you to be. Getting it now wouldn't advance My purposes for you. I want you to wait."
Waiting is not an easy thing. Waiting is not passivity. Waiting on God is not the absence of efforts. Waiting is "I've done everything I know how to do but it's not enough and now I am waiting on God to do for me what I could not do for myself."
That is such an important lesson to learn. Let me tell you about some of the benefits that you get when you wait on God. Here are five verses that spell them out.
According to Psalm 40:1 when we wait on God, He hears our prayers: "I waited patiently for the Lord and He inclined to me and heard my cry."
According to Isaiah 64:4 when we wait on God, He acts on our behalf: "Nor has the eye seen a God like You who acts on behalf of those who wait for Him." That's what God is fired up about. He works for the people who wait. I wonder how many things we don't get because we're out there working for it ourselves beyond what we should and God's like, "Would you just stop that? I act on behalf of the people who wait for Me."
Psalm 25:3 says that when we wait on God, He keeps us from shame: "Indeed none of those who wait for You O God will be ashamed."
Isaiah 40:31 says that He gives strength to those who wait: "Yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength."
Psalm 37:34 tells us that those who wait for God are exalted: "Wait for the Lord and He will exalt you."
Bottom line; God always makes it worth our while to wait for Him!
So I will rejoice in this season! I will wait patiently and know that their walk is their walk and I will not try to pull them along. I will pray for God to do it in his time, and that I live long enough to see it! I will pray, God do for them what you have done for me, or something better that is beyond beyond of what I could ever imagine. And my joy will be in him and in my journey with him, without expectations on the others in my life to join my journey. For it is my journey. They have to have their own. Does that sound selfish? Hmmmm....maybe I better rethink that.....
My expectation is in him, exceedingly, abundantly, above all we could ever ask or even think....giving him glory forever and ever, because he is all that I could ever hope for and certainly more than I deserve. And it is Jesus who brings me joy in this journey. Amen!
Showing posts with label hope. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hope. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Friday, January 8, 2010
12 Days of Christmas day 12
In our homes we have finally arrived at the 12th day of Christmas! It is still early here, and very cool for South Florida, so sitting in the garden is out of the question! My blood is too thin for that! So as I sit here thinking on Him, and how gracious he has been to me, I thank God for the opportunity I have been given to experience his love first hand, and to share his love with you.
Do you know that many people never experience his love? Actually they do experience it, but they don't realize it, nor do they even acknowledge him. I was talking with a young friend about this yesterday, and she asked me a great question: "if God is so loving and is here and involved with my life, why did he allow me to be molested when I was 5?" Wow. I am sure many people have the same type questions. I know I myself was molested 3 times by three people that I trusted, and yet, I never wondered about God's love until I was having panic attacks in my late 20's. It was at that time I began to wonder not just about God's love, but even about his very existance.
I got to the end of myself, and was as low as I could personally go. And I will never forget that day. I was so distraught and really didn't know which end was up. I wanted to believe what I had been taught, but my experiences were such that my heart and spirit were left so hurt because of my perspective on what I was going through that I just couldn't trust anything anymore. So in my desperation, I went out on my patio and cried bitterly. I didn't understand why God would allow me to walk through such a dark time and seemingly abandon me. So I looked up and said,
"God, I am not sure of anything anymore. I am not sure you even exist. But if you do, I need you to show me because if you don't, I am just going to give up."
God did show up. In a miraculous way. Instantly, it was as if I was wrapped up in his wings. I literally felt his 'feathers' around me. I smelled him, too. Like freshness after a rain. The sensation was like nothing I can adequately describe and it has never happened to me since. But I haven't needed it to. I now know that it was his Spirit that manifested himself and wrapped his arms around me. I don't know how long it lasted. I was long enough for me. I looked up again and said, "ok, now I know you exist. Where do we go from here?"
So here we are, more than 2o years later, and I can tell you why I had to go through all that. And I will.
In fact, since the 12 Days are over, God has shown me what this blog needs to be used for. It is to address those 'difficult' subjects by looking at what God's word has to say and looking to those who are wiser than I for the answers. I know I am settled in my faith, but it took many years for me to feel this way. And God is still showing me insights that help me to see things from his perspective, not only from my little tunnel vision world.
So, if you have a question, send it in. I cannot tell you for sure that I will be able to answer it, but we will explore it together and hopefully try to see it from God's perspective.
I will tell you this, I know that God has NEVER abandoned me. He was with me throughout every moment, even when I was being molested. He never left me, and was my strength and comfort. He promised, "I will never leave you nor forsake you and no one can pull you out of my hand". So I know he was always there, always holding me, protecting me. But that doesn't mean that bad things won't happen. But more on that tomorrow.
Visit www.12daysbook.com for more on our 12th Night Feast!!
Do you know that many people never experience his love? Actually they do experience it, but they don't realize it, nor do they even acknowledge him. I was talking with a young friend about this yesterday, and she asked me a great question: "if God is so loving and is here and involved with my life, why did he allow me to be molested when I was 5?" Wow. I am sure many people have the same type questions. I know I myself was molested 3 times by three people that I trusted, and yet, I never wondered about God's love until I was having panic attacks in my late 20's. It was at that time I began to wonder not just about God's love, but even about his very existance.
I got to the end of myself, and was as low as I could personally go. And I will never forget that day. I was so distraught and really didn't know which end was up. I wanted to believe what I had been taught, but my experiences were such that my heart and spirit were left so hurt because of my perspective on what I was going through that I just couldn't trust anything anymore. So in my desperation, I went out on my patio and cried bitterly. I didn't understand why God would allow me to walk through such a dark time and seemingly abandon me. So I looked up and said,
"God, I am not sure of anything anymore. I am not sure you even exist. But if you do, I need you to show me because if you don't, I am just going to give up."
God did show up. In a miraculous way. Instantly, it was as if I was wrapped up in his wings. I literally felt his 'feathers' around me. I smelled him, too. Like freshness after a rain. The sensation was like nothing I can adequately describe and it has never happened to me since. But I haven't needed it to. I now know that it was his Spirit that manifested himself and wrapped his arms around me. I don't know how long it lasted. I was long enough for me. I looked up again and said, "ok, now I know you exist. Where do we go from here?"
So here we are, more than 2o years later, and I can tell you why I had to go through all that. And I will.
In fact, since the 12 Days are over, God has shown me what this blog needs to be used for. It is to address those 'difficult' subjects by looking at what God's word has to say and looking to those who are wiser than I for the answers. I know I am settled in my faith, but it took many years for me to feel this way. And God is still showing me insights that help me to see things from his perspective, not only from my little tunnel vision world.
So, if you have a question, send it in. I cannot tell you for sure that I will be able to answer it, but we will explore it together and hopefully try to see it from God's perspective.
I will tell you this, I know that God has NEVER abandoned me. He was with me throughout every moment, even when I was being molested. He never left me, and was my strength and comfort. He promised, "I will never leave you nor forsake you and no one can pull you out of my hand". So I know he was always there, always holding me, protecting me. But that doesn't mean that bad things won't happen. But more on that tomorrow.
Visit www.12daysbook.com for more on our 12th Night Feast!!
Friday, January 1, 2010
Happy New Year!
First, I want to wish everyone a Happy, Christ-filled New Year.
Today is Day 7 of the 12 Days of Christmas, but my blog today will not be about that.
Last night I went to bed with my heart hurthin. Hurting for my friend and her daughter who is giving them a run for their money. And for myself- because my family really hurt my feelings last night.
It was after midnight, and we were getting ready to go to bed, when I mentioned doing day 6 of the 12 Days. It had been a busy day, with everyone going every which way, and I had been so busy, that I had put it off all day. When I mentioned it, I was met with groans, rolling eyes and various other signals that let me know that everyone else was displeased with my idea. These whines were not because they were tired and wanted to go to bed, but they were because they wanted to go read, play on the computer or do something, ANYTHING else.
Now, this would not have been so bad, and perhaps at another time I would have not been so hurt. After all, I did co-write the book and they have heard it for at least 4 years, they know all the stories and answers. But what made it so bad was that I had been up till 3:30 am the night before getting my oldest sons homeschool records together to send in for his credits before the deadline of Dec. 31, and then got up early to finish, AND I had left a great party early to come home so I could fix our traditional New Years Eve fondue, and celebrate by playing games with the kids like I do every New Years Eve. So I was miffed. And more than just a little bit. I said,"ok, goodnight." And went up and cried and went to sleep.
This morning, when I got up, I was still hurt. I feel like I pour every ounce of energy into them and helping them to see Christ, yet sometimes I feel like I am talking to a brick wall! The world is sooooo attractive, and so easy. And it requires only the bare minimium. Yet it only sucks the life out of us, so we are unfulfilled and left wanting more. So we try to fill it up with more world, yet are left even more empty, and desiring more self-fufilling.
Now, I have to say at this point, that I have great kids. They love me and are not afraid to show it in public, by hugging, kissing, holding hands, and by mostly doing what they are asked. And I think they love God. They all say they do, and exhibit an early love for him. But they are kids. They want to get by with the bare minimium, and when I ask them to do something extra, especially when they are busy doing something else, its the rolling eyes and huffing. They do it, but they want to be doing what they want to do and not be interrupted.
This morning, as I was praying about this in my garden, God showed me my own heart, and how I sometimes treat him as my father, and let me tell you, it is the same way as my kids sometimes treat me. OUCH!
You see, until recently, I didn't really want to read his word and spend time with him. I would say I wanted to, and I certainly felt him calling me and loving me toward him, but I was resistant. But as I have fallen in love with him more and more, I want to spend every minute with him. But it wasn't always that way. I struggled greatly for many years with a consistant "quiet time". But I never would admit it because everyone around me seemed so perfect.
But even now, I still struggle. Not so much with the daily time, but with other things that take up "my time". Like going to church. Really. I struggle with that because it takes so much time and energy to get ready to go, then travel time, then about 75 minutes of church, most of it just sitting there with my hands idle, then driving home, or eating out, half the day is gone. And we don't really know anyone at church, so going there is just not attractive. I would rather just sit at home in my P.J.'s and watch it live on the internet while I sip my tea and crochet. I am always glad I went, but it is a struggle to get out the door.
And what about other ministry and service opportunities? Quite frankly, sometimes I resent the time it takes to serve. I want to serve who I want and when I want to do it. I don't want to go to a soup kitchen or to help in kids ministry. I would reather just give money. I don't want to to to India or Asia or even North Palm Beach just 10 minutes up the road. Its easier just to throw money at the problem than to get involved.
You see, time is the only thing that we have to give that is really ours and we won't ever get more of. And it is the only thing that I really have control of. I know I have to sleep and do some work, but even those things, we have some control of. But God wants it all. And he doesn't want me to roll my eyes or sigh when he gives me something 'extra' to do. After all, if I were doing it directly to him, it would be easy, right? I mean, if I knew that Jesus would be there, wouldn't I jump at the opportunity to serve him at a soup kitchen? Or minister to a group of kids in Sunday School? Or cook a meal for him?
I just thought of something...perhaps that was the difference in Mary and Martha. Mary wanted to just love him. Martha was so busy making preparations and being resentful that she forgot that it was a joy to have the priviledge to serve him. I forget that with my family sometimes.
So I am, with his gentle help, going to give my time more freely to him and do some of the ministry things that I have been putting off, or think that they take too much time. Like going to ladies Bible study on Tuesdays. And writing more. And other service opportunities as they arise. And I am going to forgive my kids and keep plugging away. After all, that is what God as my Father has done for me. He has not given up and neither will I. One day they will "get it".
Romans 12:1 taken from 'The Message' says:
So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.
I also love the 3rd chapter of Colossians for more confirmation.
My brother-in-law and sister-in-law gave me a book with prints of beautiful flowers and scripture along side it. Todays scripture really fits (God works like that)and I wanted to share that with you too.
Ps. 71:14-16
As for me, I will always have hope.
I will praise you more and more.
My mouth will tell of your righteousness
of your salvation all day long.
though I know not its measure.
I will come and proclaim your mighty acts,
O soverign Lord;
I will come and proclaim your righteousness,
Yours alone.
Since my youth, O God, You have taught me,
And to this day I declare your marvelous deeds.
Even when I am old and gray,
Do not forsake me, O God,
till I delare your power to the next generation,
your might to all who ar to come.
Enjoy your day! Visit www.12daysbook.com and share the 12 days of Christmas with us!
Today is Day 7 of the 12 Days of Christmas, but my blog today will not be about that.
Last night I went to bed with my heart hurthin. Hurting for my friend and her daughter who is giving them a run for their money. And for myself- because my family really hurt my feelings last night.
It was after midnight, and we were getting ready to go to bed, when I mentioned doing day 6 of the 12 Days. It had been a busy day, with everyone going every which way, and I had been so busy, that I had put it off all day. When I mentioned it, I was met with groans, rolling eyes and various other signals that let me know that everyone else was displeased with my idea. These whines were not because they were tired and wanted to go to bed, but they were because they wanted to go read, play on the computer or do something, ANYTHING else.
Now, this would not have been so bad, and perhaps at another time I would have not been so hurt. After all, I did co-write the book and they have heard it for at least 4 years, they know all the stories and answers. But what made it so bad was that I had been up till 3:30 am the night before getting my oldest sons homeschool records together to send in for his credits before the deadline of Dec. 31, and then got up early to finish, AND I had left a great party early to come home so I could fix our traditional New Years Eve fondue, and celebrate by playing games with the kids like I do every New Years Eve. So I was miffed. And more than just a little bit. I said,"ok, goodnight." And went up and cried and went to sleep.
This morning, when I got up, I was still hurt. I feel like I pour every ounce of energy into them and helping them to see Christ, yet sometimes I feel like I am talking to a brick wall! The world is sooooo attractive, and so easy. And it requires only the bare minimium. Yet it only sucks the life out of us, so we are unfulfilled and left wanting more. So we try to fill it up with more world, yet are left even more empty, and desiring more self-fufilling.
Now, I have to say at this point, that I have great kids. They love me and are not afraid to show it in public, by hugging, kissing, holding hands, and by mostly doing what they are asked. And I think they love God. They all say they do, and exhibit an early love for him. But they are kids. They want to get by with the bare minimium, and when I ask them to do something extra, especially when they are busy doing something else, its the rolling eyes and huffing. They do it, but they want to be doing what they want to do and not be interrupted.
This morning, as I was praying about this in my garden, God showed me my own heart, and how I sometimes treat him as my father, and let me tell you, it is the same way as my kids sometimes treat me. OUCH!
You see, until recently, I didn't really want to read his word and spend time with him. I would say I wanted to, and I certainly felt him calling me and loving me toward him, but I was resistant. But as I have fallen in love with him more and more, I want to spend every minute with him. But it wasn't always that way. I struggled greatly for many years with a consistant "quiet time". But I never would admit it because everyone around me seemed so perfect.
But even now, I still struggle. Not so much with the daily time, but with other things that take up "my time". Like going to church. Really. I struggle with that because it takes so much time and energy to get ready to go, then travel time, then about 75 minutes of church, most of it just sitting there with my hands idle, then driving home, or eating out, half the day is gone. And we don't really know anyone at church, so going there is just not attractive. I would rather just sit at home in my P.J.'s and watch it live on the internet while I sip my tea and crochet. I am always glad I went, but it is a struggle to get out the door.
And what about other ministry and service opportunities? Quite frankly, sometimes I resent the time it takes to serve. I want to serve who I want and when I want to do it. I don't want to go to a soup kitchen or to help in kids ministry. I would reather just give money. I don't want to to to India or Asia or even North Palm Beach just 10 minutes up the road. Its easier just to throw money at the problem than to get involved.
You see, time is the only thing that we have to give that is really ours and we won't ever get more of. And it is the only thing that I really have control of. I know I have to sleep and do some work, but even those things, we have some control of. But God wants it all. And he doesn't want me to roll my eyes or sigh when he gives me something 'extra' to do. After all, if I were doing it directly to him, it would be easy, right? I mean, if I knew that Jesus would be there, wouldn't I jump at the opportunity to serve him at a soup kitchen? Or minister to a group of kids in Sunday School? Or cook a meal for him?
I just thought of something...perhaps that was the difference in Mary and Martha. Mary wanted to just love him. Martha was so busy making preparations and being resentful that she forgot that it was a joy to have the priviledge to serve him. I forget that with my family sometimes.
So I am, with his gentle help, going to give my time more freely to him and do some of the ministry things that I have been putting off, or think that they take too much time. Like going to ladies Bible study on Tuesdays. And writing more. And other service opportunities as they arise. And I am going to forgive my kids and keep plugging away. After all, that is what God as my Father has done for me. He has not given up and neither will I. One day they will "get it".
Romans 12:1 taken from 'The Message' says:
So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.
I also love the 3rd chapter of Colossians for more confirmation.
My brother-in-law and sister-in-law gave me a book with prints of beautiful flowers and scripture along side it. Todays scripture really fits (God works like that)and I wanted to share that with you too.
Ps. 71:14-16
As for me, I will always have hope.
I will praise you more and more.
My mouth will tell of your righteousness
of your salvation all day long.
though I know not its measure.
I will come and proclaim your mighty acts,
O soverign Lord;
I will come and proclaim your righteousness,
Yours alone.
Since my youth, O God, You have taught me,
And to this day I declare your marvelous deeds.
Even when I am old and gray,
Do not forsake me, O God,
till I delare your power to the next generation,
your might to all who ar to come.
Enjoy your day! Visit www.12daysbook.com and share the 12 days of Christmas with us!
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Day Three of the 12 Days of Christmas
Ok, I had good intentions. Really I did. But Linda and I were having so much fun that the day got away from us, and by the time I got home from her house, which is only a few minutes away, It was almost 1 AM and I just fell into bed. You see, Linda's husband bought her a new toy for Christmas. One of those fancy sergers (sewing machine) with some amazing stitches and we were busy all day making pajamas for the kids and baby blankets for the crisis pregnancy center. And we didn't do too badly, either. 12 blankets finished, 15 pajama bottoms cut out, 1 finished completely and 5 sewn partially. Plus we cooked dinner for both families and put dinner in the crock pot to be cooked today. It is amazing what can be accomplished when you work together! I guess that is why God expects us to work together as his body. But that subject is for another blog!!
Anyway, when I had my time with God in the garden, he took me again to Colossians. I love that letter. It was so appropriate for the subject of the day: The three french hens represent Faith, Hope and Love. And that is exactly what the verses I read today focused on.
Colossians 1:3-6 says:
We (Paul was speaking) always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you, because we have heard of your faith and love that springs from the hope that is stored up for you in heaven and that you have already heard about in the word of truth, the gospel that has come to you. All over the world this gospel is bearing fruit and growing, just as it has been doing among you since the day you heard it and understood God's grace in all its truth.
Wow! If that doesn't fit in with the day, I don't know what does! We have been given the gift of faith in Jesus Christ. He revealed himself to us, and that gives us hope. Hope for now, and a hope for the future. This isn't all there is, folks. I tell my kids that all the time. I want them to be focused on the things to come, not on the here and now. And the hope within us bears forth love- love for our families, friends and kindred spirits. But also love for those 'irregular people'. Those that are not easy to love, but that God loves just the same.
Who is that in your life? I know who it is in mine. Actually, there are several. One of them, I have to spend time with this weekend. And it is someone who is a believer, and has hurt me deeply, in ways unfathomable. But how can I overcome my feelings and love him anyway?
First, remember that God loves them too. And then that we are "forgiven as we forgive those who trespass against us". I don't understand how they could have done what they did, but I have said careless words and heartless comments. And I sure want to be forgiven. So I better forgive!
Second, let it go. Even though you don't feel like it, choose to forgive. When you pray, tell Jesus, "I am so hurt by ----- and I don't want to forgive them. But I choose to forgive. Would you give me a willing heart to forgive and help my feelings to follow?" I also remember that unforgiveness is one of the leading causes of colon cancer. It will literally eat you alive. It causes bitterness and damage that affects you physically and all other relationships. So give it to God and he will help you let go of the past.
Third, pray for the person. Realize that they are lost. If not lost, they are still mortal and living in a fallen world, so therefore capable of sin. They probably didn't even realize how much you were hurt, and if they did, they need to seek forgiveness. But even if they never do, you need to, for your sake and for the sake of Christ, forgive them. If they know what they did, and are unrepentant, you might need to go to them and tell them you forgive them anyway. Ask God, and he will tell you what to do. Don't flaunt it in their face, like I am better than you because you did not ask and still I forgive. But humbly tell them you forgive them and you are not going to let a root of bitterness take root in your heart. If they are blissfully unaware, perhaps you should just leave it that way. If God wants you to bring it up, he will tell you. But if it is someone you have to face daily, and they are a fellow believer, you may need to tell them. You know the situation best, and if you truly desire restoration, God will lead you.
One word of caution: Don't be a doormat. If there is a broken relationship, and it is a continual thing, seek help. Seek wise council and God's word for the answer. But know that continually being abused is not healthy. For you or for the other person. Loving someone doesn't mean they get to abuse you. You want restoration and reconcilliation, but that cannot happen in a hostile environment. Hostility is no way to treat another human being.
We are so thankful that God has shown us himself in Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. We have faith in him, and hope springs up from our faith, which then allows us to love beyond what is humanly possible. Aren't you so thankful?
Our journey is 1/4 of the way over. But you can still join in. Go to www.12daysbook.com and order your copy of The 12 Days of Christmas in an ebook so you can download now. You'll be glad you did!!
Anyway, when I had my time with God in the garden, he took me again to Colossians. I love that letter. It was so appropriate for the subject of the day: The three french hens represent Faith, Hope and Love. And that is exactly what the verses I read today focused on.
Colossians 1:3-6 says:
We (Paul was speaking) always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you, because we have heard of your faith and love that springs from the hope that is stored up for you in heaven and that you have already heard about in the word of truth, the gospel that has come to you. All over the world this gospel is bearing fruit and growing, just as it has been doing among you since the day you heard it and understood God's grace in all its truth.
Wow! If that doesn't fit in with the day, I don't know what does! We have been given the gift of faith in Jesus Christ. He revealed himself to us, and that gives us hope. Hope for now, and a hope for the future. This isn't all there is, folks. I tell my kids that all the time. I want them to be focused on the things to come, not on the here and now. And the hope within us bears forth love- love for our families, friends and kindred spirits. But also love for those 'irregular people'. Those that are not easy to love, but that God loves just the same.
Who is that in your life? I know who it is in mine. Actually, there are several. One of them, I have to spend time with this weekend. And it is someone who is a believer, and has hurt me deeply, in ways unfathomable. But how can I overcome my feelings and love him anyway?
First, remember that God loves them too. And then that we are "forgiven as we forgive those who trespass against us". I don't understand how they could have done what they did, but I have said careless words and heartless comments. And I sure want to be forgiven. So I better forgive!
Second, let it go. Even though you don't feel like it, choose to forgive. When you pray, tell Jesus, "I am so hurt by ----- and I don't want to forgive them. But I choose to forgive. Would you give me a willing heart to forgive and help my feelings to follow?" I also remember that unforgiveness is one of the leading causes of colon cancer. It will literally eat you alive. It causes bitterness and damage that affects you physically and all other relationships. So give it to God and he will help you let go of the past.
Third, pray for the person. Realize that they are lost. If not lost, they are still mortal and living in a fallen world, so therefore capable of sin. They probably didn't even realize how much you were hurt, and if they did, they need to seek forgiveness. But even if they never do, you need to, for your sake and for the sake of Christ, forgive them. If they know what they did, and are unrepentant, you might need to go to them and tell them you forgive them anyway. Ask God, and he will tell you what to do. Don't flaunt it in their face, like I am better than you because you did not ask and still I forgive. But humbly tell them you forgive them and you are not going to let a root of bitterness take root in your heart. If they are blissfully unaware, perhaps you should just leave it that way. If God wants you to bring it up, he will tell you. But if it is someone you have to face daily, and they are a fellow believer, you may need to tell them. You know the situation best, and if you truly desire restoration, God will lead you.
One word of caution: Don't be a doormat. If there is a broken relationship, and it is a continual thing, seek help. Seek wise council and God's word for the answer. But know that continually being abused is not healthy. For you or for the other person. Loving someone doesn't mean they get to abuse you. You want restoration and reconcilliation, but that cannot happen in a hostile environment. Hostility is no way to treat another human being.
We are so thankful that God has shown us himself in Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. We have faith in him, and hope springs up from our faith, which then allows us to love beyond what is humanly possible. Aren't you so thankful?
Our journey is 1/4 of the way over. But you can still join in. Go to www.12daysbook.com and order your copy of The 12 Days of Christmas in an ebook so you can download now. You'll be glad you did!!
Friday, December 25, 2009
December 25th, Christmas Day!
What a day! We got up early and of course, opened gifts. My family was too good to me this year, as usual.
Afterward,As I was fixing pancakes for breakfast, I was hit between the eyes with the fact that my second born baby girl was missing. And I had to cry. She is living in California now, and since she was home for Thanksgiving, we couldn't bring her home for Christmas too, nor could she get the time off. So I had to settle for talking to her on the phone several times during the day. So my day was filled with joy, mingled with sadness.
Now that all our parents are spending Christmas with Jesus, we usually have dinner at home. We usually do an international dinner, with traditional food from another country. But this year, my husband's brother invited us to their home that is about two hours south of here and since Sarah was not coming home, and she is our 'foodie' and traditions mean the most to her, I jumped at the opportunity to not cook on the holiday. So we headed south. And I lost it.
I was so disagreeable to my husband, and he just took it. He is such a great guy. He deserves so much better than me. But I am so thankful I got him. I was so tired, (from being up too late Christmas Eve doing stockings and wrapping the last of the gifts,)and so sad that I just exploded at him. I didn't even realize how much Sarahs first Christmas away has affected me until I just wrote the above paragraph. But I did know there was a melancholy sadness hanging over me all day. I just didn't realize where it was coming from.
Amazing how those things affect us. Yet we don't have to let them run our lives. Yesterday we looked at 1 Peter 1:13-16. Verse 16 says For it is written: "be holy becasue I am holy."
That whole passage gives me hope. It implies that I have a choice. I do not have to let my feelings rule. I can choose the higher road and choose holiness. That applies to every area of my life. Even those I don't like to admit that I can choose to let him control. And as I let him control more and more, he shows me more and more and challenges my way of living to help me to be more like him.
Remember: We start the 12 Days of Christmas tomorrow! Hope you will join us! www.12daysbook.com
Afterward,As I was fixing pancakes for breakfast, I was hit between the eyes with the fact that my second born baby girl was missing. And I had to cry. She is living in California now, and since she was home for Thanksgiving, we couldn't bring her home for Christmas too, nor could she get the time off. So I had to settle for talking to her on the phone several times during the day. So my day was filled with joy, mingled with sadness.
Now that all our parents are spending Christmas with Jesus, we usually have dinner at home. We usually do an international dinner, with traditional food from another country. But this year, my husband's brother invited us to their home that is about two hours south of here and since Sarah was not coming home, and she is our 'foodie' and traditions mean the most to her, I jumped at the opportunity to not cook on the holiday. So we headed south. And I lost it.
I was so disagreeable to my husband, and he just took it. He is such a great guy. He deserves so much better than me. But I am so thankful I got him. I was so tired, (from being up too late Christmas Eve doing stockings and wrapping the last of the gifts,)and so sad that I just exploded at him. I didn't even realize how much Sarahs first Christmas away has affected me until I just wrote the above paragraph. But I did know there was a melancholy sadness hanging over me all day. I just didn't realize where it was coming from.
Amazing how those things affect us. Yet we don't have to let them run our lives. Yesterday we looked at 1 Peter 1:13-16. Verse 16 says For it is written: "be holy becasue I am holy."
That whole passage gives me hope. It implies that I have a choice. I do not have to let my feelings rule. I can choose the higher road and choose holiness. That applies to every area of my life. Even those I don't like to admit that I can choose to let him control. And as I let him control more and more, he shows me more and more and challenges my way of living to help me to be more like him.
Remember: We start the 12 Days of Christmas tomorrow! Hope you will join us! www.12daysbook.com
Saturday, December 19, 2009
December Nineteenth
Today is the 20th anniversary of my 29th birthday. I love having my birthday near Jesus' birthday....now. But I used to hate it. Getting your birthday presents wrapped in Christmas paper was bad. But it really stunk when you would get one gift and be told it was for both birthday AND Christmas. That happened more often than I would like to tell. I used to get so mad about that, and think to myself: well, your birthday is in July. What if I combined your Christmas present with your birthday gift...I tell you, I thought it just wasn't fair! Most of the time my birthday was just a part of the larger Holiday celebration that went from Thanksgiving to New Years. I used to get so disappointed. I got my hopes up every year. Great expectations.
Do you ever get disappointed with God? I am often disappointed, because I set up expectations, and do not communicate them well. I still have so much growing up to do. You would think by now, that I would be past those petty things, but I often get hurt because of my failure to articulate my desires and expectations. And sometimes it ends up that I place those feelings upon God.
Recently I have realized that although my life is wonderful, it has not turned out as I had hoped. There are many reasons for this, but that is unimportant. The important thing is my focus.
Colossians 3:18 Says:
Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
This scripture follows the ones that talk about taking off the sinful nature and putting on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Then he tells us to bear with one another, forgive and let love bind everything together. And that whatever you do, do it as unto the Lord.
Why do you think he puts all those things first, then tells us to submit to our husbands?
I think it is because we need to do all those things in order to be submissive. But it is more than that. We have to let go of the disappointments, the past and the present way things are so we can move on with God.
Lately I have had to put this into practice. If you walked in my shoes, you would think I have it all. Nice home, great kids, my husband home 24-7 to help with everything. And it is great. I am so blessed that I have nothing ever to complain about. But it is not what I expected. I have learned the hard way that all of this is great, but what is really important is not seen here on earth. It is what lies ahead on heavens shores. And I want this to be the entire focus of my life. No matter how things turn out, moment by moment, daily or even all together, I have to focus on his purposes; that they are higher, better and more wonderful than I can ever imagine.
So I am learning that when I get disappointed it is usually that I am micro-focused, and not looking at the big picture that God is trying to accomplish in my life. Ouch! That is so hard to for me to remember. I am so glad God is big enough to take my whining and complaining, and that he is faithful enough to show me the truth.
So today, do something special for your spouse or someone special in your life. I suggest something I read in a book somewhere. This older couple had a phrase that they used with one another. I am not going to tell you their phrase. You need to come up with your own. Write it down and pass it on to your mate. Sit down with your mate and tell them how much you love and appreciate them, and then explain to them that you are going to start something new. Whenever you give this phrase to them, they have to pass it back to you. Then you pass it back to them. Do it secretly and in different and fun ways. For example, you could write it in the steam of the bathroom mirror so that every time the mirror steams up, they see it. I like to write it on the mirror in lipstick. Or in the dust on the dresser! Or on a piece of paper on his pillow. You get the idea. For me, this helps put it into perspective. And takes the focus off of what he is doing wrong onto what I can do better. And makes me grateful for how wonderful my life truly is.
Now I love having my birthday near our Lord's. I love it being part of the larger celebration. I don't even mind having my gift combined...but it better be a good one! And don't tell my husband. He can't get off that easy! Unless, of course it is a huge diamond or maybe a new Lexus.......
Do you ever get disappointed with God? I am often disappointed, because I set up expectations, and do not communicate them well. I still have so much growing up to do. You would think by now, that I would be past those petty things, but I often get hurt because of my failure to articulate my desires and expectations. And sometimes it ends up that I place those feelings upon God.
Recently I have realized that although my life is wonderful, it has not turned out as I had hoped. There are many reasons for this, but that is unimportant. The important thing is my focus.
Colossians 3:18 Says:
Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
This scripture follows the ones that talk about taking off the sinful nature and putting on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Then he tells us to bear with one another, forgive and let love bind everything together. And that whatever you do, do it as unto the Lord.
Why do you think he puts all those things first, then tells us to submit to our husbands?
I think it is because we need to do all those things in order to be submissive. But it is more than that. We have to let go of the disappointments, the past and the present way things are so we can move on with God.
Lately I have had to put this into practice. If you walked in my shoes, you would think I have it all. Nice home, great kids, my husband home 24-7 to help with everything. And it is great. I am so blessed that I have nothing ever to complain about. But it is not what I expected. I have learned the hard way that all of this is great, but what is really important is not seen here on earth. It is what lies ahead on heavens shores. And I want this to be the entire focus of my life. No matter how things turn out, moment by moment, daily or even all together, I have to focus on his purposes; that they are higher, better and more wonderful than I can ever imagine.
So I am learning that when I get disappointed it is usually that I am micro-focused, and not looking at the big picture that God is trying to accomplish in my life. Ouch! That is so hard to for me to remember. I am so glad God is big enough to take my whining and complaining, and that he is faithful enough to show me the truth.
So today, do something special for your spouse or someone special in your life. I suggest something I read in a book somewhere. This older couple had a phrase that they used with one another. I am not going to tell you their phrase. You need to come up with your own. Write it down and pass it on to your mate. Sit down with your mate and tell them how much you love and appreciate them, and then explain to them that you are going to start something new. Whenever you give this phrase to them, they have to pass it back to you. Then you pass it back to them. Do it secretly and in different and fun ways. For example, you could write it in the steam of the bathroom mirror so that every time the mirror steams up, they see it. I like to write it on the mirror in lipstick. Or in the dust on the dresser! Or on a piece of paper on his pillow. You get the idea. For me, this helps put it into perspective. And takes the focus off of what he is doing wrong onto what I can do better. And makes me grateful for how wonderful my life truly is.
Now I love having my birthday near our Lord's. I love it being part of the larger celebration. I don't even mind having my gift combined...but it better be a good one! And don't tell my husband. He can't get off that easy! Unless, of course it is a huge diamond or maybe a new Lexus.......
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